Jumat, 02 Mei 2014

!! PDF Ebook The Single Dad Detour: Directions for Fathering After Divorce, by Tez Brooks

PDF Ebook The Single Dad Detour: Directions for Fathering After Divorce, by Tez Brooks

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The Single Dad Detour: Directions for Fathering After Divorce, by Tez Brooks

The Single Dad Detour: Directions for Fathering After Divorce, by Tez Brooks



The Single Dad Detour: Directions for Fathering After Divorce, by Tez Brooks

PDF Ebook The Single Dad Detour: Directions for Fathering After Divorce, by Tez Brooks

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The Single Dad Detour: Directions for Fathering After Divorce, by Tez Brooks

Practical steps to embrace God's mission for single Dads

Conventional wisdom holds that fathers have few parenting skills and that mothers always know best. The single father is often considered a mythical creature, found only in sitcoms as an object of humor or pity. Where does that leave real single dads? Too often, it makes them susceptible to overcompensation or apathy.

Tez Brooks knows those feelings all too well. He’s traveled that road with his own children after an unexpected divorce. The Single Dad Detour is the result of his journey and the lessons he’s learned along the way. It’s a guidebook for the rocky road of single fatherhood, extending encouragement, confidence, and challenges, using specific examples from dads who’ve survived parenting and have hope to offer.

There are no unreachable requirements for perfect fatherhood here and no twisty theological mysteries—just authentic, down-to-earth wisdom from one dad to another.

  • Sales Rank: #1421239 in Books
  • Brand: Kregel Publications
  • Published on: 2015-02-27
  • Original language: English
  • Number of items: 1
  • Dimensions: 8.40" h x .60" w x 5.40" l, .50 pounds
  • Binding: Paperback
  • 192 pages

Review
Practical steps to embrace God's mission for single-again dads. --Bill Hodgson, national director Campus Crusade for Christ Australia

If I were a single parent on this journey, I'd want Tez's comforting voice on my GPS. It's a warm and understanding voice that's traveled the back roads and knows where it's going. --Rick James author of Jesus Without Religion and A Million Ways to Die

For an easily overlooked demographic, Tez Brooks wisely, honestly, and courageously deep-dives into how divorced fathers can survive being single and still be really good dads. --Rohan Dredge, founder and CEO New Level Leadership

About the Author
Tez Brooks is the father of four children and a missionary filmmaker for The Jesus Film Project. He has also been a journalist for Cru and a Florida law enforcement officer. Tez has been speaking and writing books and articles for over thirty years.

Most helpful customer reviews

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful.
Valuable Resource Despite Conservative Views on Gender Roles
By Amazon Customer
First of all, I just want to say that, though I am not a divorced father, I can see that such a resource is needed. There are many single parenting books out there, but we are not overloaded with books about being a single father, and his Christian perspective locks Brooks into an even smaller niche that clearly has room for more voices. The book is set up with an automotive theme, as each chapter deals with “tune-ups,” “bodywork,” “taking the bus,” and other car-related metaphors. What could have been a cheesy idea actually gives the book a strong connecting thread and ties everything together in an interesting way. Each chapter focuses on a different aspect of divorced parental life, and ends with some questions to answer, some scripture to read, some advice, and a prayer. It’s a good structure, and it makes the book almost like a devotional workbook.

I do have to say though, if I am giving an honest review, that what did not resonate with me was Brooks views on women. I mentioned before that I was worried about an ultra-conservative Christian viewpoint, but most of the time I happily felt myself agreeing with Brooks as he gave parental advice. When he veered into the marriage and dating world, however, we will have to agree to disagree. You know if you have read any of my other posts on this site that I feel very strongly about gender equality, which actually is quite biblical. And look, I know (because I read it) that you can justify almost anything with the Bible if you just pick and choose your favorite verses, but here’s one of my favorites anyway:

Galatians 3:28 – There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. (NIV)

There is no male and female. We are all one. I don’t understand how that seems to have gotten lost along the church’s way. Does that mean that gender does not exist and that we all have the same sexual organs? No, of course not. But it means that, spiritually, we are all equal. So when Brooks says things like “Now I’m not saying we need to feminize our role by trying to be both a father and mother. The male role is already enough at risk.” I want to say to him, of course it is! Of course it is at risk, and that’s a good thing. In Christ Jesus we are all equal. Men can be stay-at-home dads and women can run businesses, and that’s a good thing. Clinging desperately to an antiquated role does not help either men or women. There were plenty of other examples of gender bias in the book, even when he was trying to be chivalrous (and you know I have some things to say about chivalry that I don't have room for here), but the thing is, I think Tez Brooks is a good guy who has some really good advice. In the same chapter in which he warns us of losing our male roles, he advocates for decorating your apartment well. He wants men to learn to cook. He waxes poetic about how, for him, cooking is an art. He clearly enjoys it. His writing clearly indicates that men need to be able to do the traditionally female activities! It’s almost like he just can’t fully say it out loud yet. And you know, maybe for the intended audience of this book, that’s exactly how they need to hear that message.

Where Brooks really shines are his personal anecdotes and stories that give a personal account of his own failures and parenting potholes. I laughed out loud more than once, reading about some of the crazy stuff he did, and then what he had to do to make things right. His stories about losing his children were heartbreaking, and his experiences are real in a way that we can all understand, even if we haven’t been in his shoes. This is a voice and a perspective that is needed. I may not be divorced, and I hope that I never am, but my parents split up when I was in third grade. Whatever else you may take from this review, I can tell you this with full sincerity: I wish my dad had had this book thirty years ago. It would have made a world of difference.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Audio version quite different .
By T. Brooks
Im the author of this book. I'd like to warn potential buyers of the audio version.

I got a copy to see what it was like, and was very disappointed. In traditional publishing, you sell your rights to the book, so potentially, other versions (like this audiobook) can be created without the author's knowledge or input. That's just business. Granted, my book wasn't designed to be an audiobook. It includes QR codes and websites in some of the sidebars. That aside, the narrator confuses readers when he reads the titles and sub-titles. He also stops in the middle of a page or thought and pauses to read a sidebar that may/may not relate to the text he just finished reading.

Some of the sideboard items are quotes from famous fathers, but the narrator doesn't bother to tell the listener, so it comes off as if I (the author) am saying it. He skips the interactive items at the end of each chapter. The recording company instead refers listeners to a PDF that can be downloaded off the fourth CD. A decision that doesn't encourage the listener to consider immediate take-aways unless they bother to listen to the 4th CD later.

Worst of all, the narrator mispronounces my daughter's name a zillion times. He even mispronounces some Australian words while trying to mock a very fake Aussie accent while reading dialogue. (Not sure why they wouldn't bother to contact the author to ask a few simple clarifying questions).

Finally, the humor sprinkled throughout the book is often missed for lack of correct timing. They even changed the words of my text whenever they felt it needed it, losing much of its "oomph". Listeners wont enjoy the overall tone of the narrator as it sounds like he's instructing dads rather than coming alongside as a friend. In all, I'm not sure it's worth the extra money--stick with the book.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
A much-needed book for single dads
By Carole Jarvis
I'm not the target audience for this book, but I chose to review it because I thought The Single Dad Detour might be a valuable asset to the many men who find themselves in this life situation - and I was exactly right! I can't speak on how it compares to other books on this topic because I don't believe there's much out there for divorced/single dads. The Single Dad Detour is a much-needed book, functional and practical in the topics covered, and very well written.

In the introduction, Tez writes: "What we will learn is how to be a rock for our kids while still healing from the trauma ourselves." Tez is someone I've grown to admire through these pages - because he's been in a rough place, endured the unthinkable, made mistakes, failed, succeeded, and come through it closer to his children and to God than ever before. There's nothing "preachy" about this book; Tez just writes in a conversational style from the heart, with raw honesty and humor, drawing from his own experiences and those of others he has met.

Part of The Single Dad Detour offers practical help with this new reality, such as creating a new home environment, cooking, physical health, and making new family traditions. Other sections deal with the emotional side, like the pain of rejection, grieving and overcompensating. I loved chapter 10, a great visual where Tez uses various models of cars to illustrate the image traps dads can fall into.

Most important of all, Tez devotes much attention to our personal relationship with God - putting God on the throne of our hearts, the need for meeting with other believers, being in community - and then modeling God to our children. One of my favorite sections is chapter 10, where Tez talks about the supreme importance of abiding in Christ. Drawing from the story of Mary and Martha, he closes with this thought:

"Everything the world throws at single dads - lust for sexual encounters, desire for possessions for ourselves and our kids, recognition as good dads - it all comes from mere humans. There's nothing honorable or long-lasting about it, because this planet is fizzling out, along with all the stuff in it. But fathers who choose the good portion (that of spending time in God's presence) have chosen something that lasts forever."

The Single Dad Detour would be a great asset to any single dad - whether just going through this situation or several years on the other side. If there's a single dad in your family or circle of friends, giving them this book and praying for them would have tremendous impact. Highly recommended.

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